Saturday, May 22, 2010

Love yourself first, because you're worth it

Okay, time for one of those corny posts where I try to invoke all kinds of warm fuzzies. ;)

Recently, I've been noticing a theme while listening to people at weight watchers meetings, or watching reality television shows. It's a theme that I admit to finding disturbing.

The theme is: "I hated myself when I was fat." of "I hate myself because I'm fat."

Sure, this can be used as motivation to change, and if something helps you lose the weight, it's largely good, but there's one vital flaw with this being the driving factor.

Losing weight will not fix your problems. If you hate yourself when you are overweight, you will likely still hate yourself when you have lost it. You might be able to hide that hate behind a smaller size of clothes, but it will still be there and it will haunt you.

I've lost weight before, and I always thought that it would fix me. It would fix my problems and it would fix my self esteem. After the initial uphoria of getting the weight off, the problems resurfaced because they were still there. Ultimately, I gained the weight back, and there's no doubt in my mind that it was partly because I just didn't think I was worth it.

You have to believe that you are worth it.

That's what it comes down to. You have to like yourself enough that you are worth doing this for. You are worth taking the time to go for a run, or go to the gym. You are worth cooking good, healthy meals for, even if you're the only one to eat it. You are worth getting healthy for, so that you can live a long healthy life. For yourself. You are good enough and you are worth it.

You don't have to be thin to be lovable. I am lucky enough to have met a man almost 8 years ago that loved me despite the fact I was very overweight at the time. It's taken many more years for me to realize that I can love myself too.

Right now, I still need to lose almost 50 pounds, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm happy. I'm a pretty swell person. I am a loving wife, a devoted mother, and a loyal friend. I'm a decent cook, gardener, teacher, and many other things.

But most of all, I am lovable. Sure, I still want to lose weight. I'll love myself then too. But it doesn't mean I can't start now.

3 comments:

  1. You're much more than a "pretty swell person"! Really insightful and wise, too! And generous to share your insight and wisdom!

    This is really a gem of a post, Deb. Lots of truth. Making me think. Thanks!

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  2. Wow this post made me completely emotional. I have lost a ton of weight, but I am in the "fat person mentality" I absolutely freak out about myself when I look in the mirror. I am trying to love myself. I think that's the most important thing to do. I now try to wake up... go into the bathroom look in the mirror and say "hello beautiful" and then brush my teeth. It's helping me a lot!

    xo

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